Lately, I have been reading voraciously. I feel like a beggar who’d been invited to a 1000 course feast at the King’s palace – or to put it in a local context – a Singaporean at a buffet.

I devour the words on the page. It quite literally feels like I’m eating them, relishing the sounds, the meanings, the feelings, in my head. I read at breakneck speed and it feels like my hunger cannot be satisfied, or the food is too good to stop.

This is great. I’m so glad that I’m enjoying reading this much again. I didn’t enjoy, or desire it when I was at my old job.

For many of you who know me, you might not know this one tiny fact about me – that I’m a little claustrophobic. Not a very convenient phobia to have in such a small country like Singapore.

I’ve spent the past couple of mornings with my face shoved up some random stranger’s armpits, or pressed up against them, and I mean that in the least sexy way possible, on my way to work.

This morning was no different. I spent the entire train ride with some woman’s ass humping my pelvis. Morning sex – with a complete stranger – how nice. Not. If I were to get some “action” in the morning, I would have at least liked it to be with a guy? Or with someone who at least bothered to wash her hair this morning…

Last night, I went to Marina Square to catch the fireworks and countdown to the new year with Shih Ling and her boyfriend. The fireworks were quite spectacular. I kinda liked it more than last year’s although we had a better vantage point last year.

But every year, we’re super blessed because we always manage to pick the spot where the fireworks look like they’re exploding in front of our faces. After the countdown, we went to catch National Treasure 2. The movie was not bad, not great or wow, but just entertaining. I’ve always been fascinated with history and conspiracy theories. And watching the movie re-ignited my fascination all over again. I’m gonna pick up some books to read on the topic, but like where do I start?

As you spend the start of the year looking up to heaven, so spend every single day of the year the same way.

It’s time for one of those posts again. The obligatory end-of-year post on the pit-falls and successes of the year ‘almost’ gone-by.

I thank my Daddy God that 2007 was a year of more successes than pit-falls and that most of the pit-falls were eventually turned into successes anyway.

If I had to sum up 2007 in two words, it would be, ‘cared for’. 2007 was a year in which I felt really loved and cared for by my Daddy God. From finding a job, joining a ministry, quitting the ministry, joining a cell group, quitting the cell group, joining another cell group etc. I felt like everything was painstakingly crafted by the One who watches over me. And even when I made mistakes, even when I was going through a tough time, it always felt that He was hovering nearby, ever ready to RUN to my aid. I have no doubt that everything that happened to me this year — all the good stuff and the bad stuff that turned into good stuff — all of it was choreographed by Daddy God. Do I believe in coincidence? No, I absolutely do not believe in coincidence because I know that all my steps are ordered by the Lord and are divine.

Here are the more memorable events that happened in 2007. Snapshots of the year, if you would.

1) The Job Search

The job search literally felt like hell on earth on many occasions. I went through many horrible interviews that led me to question my worth, my communication abilities and even if I was perhaps from outerspace. A few interviewers even made pretty hurtful and belittling remarks. But it was also through this painful process that I learnt a lot in terms of revelations and spiritual lessons. And it was through this that I learnt that all my worth was found in Him and had to be built on Him. I believe this was my training ground.

I started the job search while I was still completing my degree. I met with many closed doors during this time and I kept questioning God why this was happening. I cried to Him on many occasions. He told me that I was to complete my studies and He would give me a job as soon as I graduate. Somehow, I brushed this word aside with my religious thinking: “Of course it’s not God. God would want me to be productive. He wouldn’t want me to JUST STUDY part-time and LAZE AROUND”.

But, as they say, hindsight is always 20/20. Exactly one week after I got the results for my final assignments, I got a job. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that that was God speaking to me. The way in which I got this job is a testimony all by itself, but I shall not record it here. Suffice to say that it is grace and grace alone that I got this job. Lesson learnt here? It’s ok to LAZE AROUND. Haha.

2) Work

Many of you know that I hate my current boss. But, I do love most parts of what I do. And God has shown me His favour time and time again in my working place. From readers writing in spontaneously one month after I joined the company (which has never happened before and which my boss and my colleague were trying to make happen), to grace for the many mistakes I made while working and my ability to cope with my workload, no matter how much was piled on me, I see His grace all over.

3) Family Relationships

This year, relationships with my parents are very much better. And I’m very glad my sister has embraced the message of grace.

4) Joining and Quitting the Ministry

2007 is a year where I really stretched myself and stepped out of my comfort zone. I joined the choir by myself and joined a cell group by myself. It would normally take a lot of courage for me to take this step because I’m quite afraid of new social situations, but this time, I didn’t feel scared at all. Although I later quit the ministry and stopped attending the cell group, I learnt a lot from it. And now I’ve finally found a cell group where I’m quite comfortable with the people in it.

The major thing I learnt from joining the choir and later quitting is that it’s ok to make mistakes. It’s ok to miss God. It’s not a failure, neither is it something to be embarrassed about.

5) Revelations

This is the year where I truly know I’m loved by Daddy God. Truly truly loved. There’s a difference in knowing it in my head and knowing it as I do now. Nothing and no one can convince me otherwise now.

And I am also thankful that the revelation of righteousness by faith keeps getting deeper and more real every year.

Kudos: honour, acclaim

Kudos to You, Jesus. All honour, acclaim and glory to You. Thank You for 2007!

So goodbye, 2007, I had fun, but let 2008 come man!

2008 is gonna be good. Pastor Prince said that it’s the year where the blessings of Deuteronomy 28 will manifest in our lives. And Daddy God told me it’s going to be a year of break-throughs for me. I am excited about 2008! This will also be the year where I will go to Israel with Shih Ling. Amen!

The news that Sex and the City (SATC) is now available on SingTel Mio hardly made any waves. Finally, almost 10 years after its launch, the show will be allowed to screen on our shores. But I guess by this time, those who are interested in the show have already watched it and the rest, well they just can’t be bothered. 

Hailed as a show which was very fashion-forward when it was launched, the only reason to watch it now for any form of fashion advice/fashion trends is to find out what people wore back then. Though the issues remain very relevant, they have been discussed almost to death for the past couple of years. In other words, while the show may be entertaining it is so over. To all the censors and relevant authorities, this is what happens when you behave like a prude (in your thinking at least). You get left behind. 

My stomach feels queasy and I’m burning up, but I’ve never been happier to be sick. No work tomorrow!

For those who are interested, I’ve set up a separate blog to chronicle all the retarded things my boss does. Click here. Hopefully, this blog will now be completely work-free.

Should I be grateful that there is never a dull moment in my job? Well, at least it provides me with fodder for this blog. I’m seriously considering adding a whole category titled: “The Retarded Things My Retarded Boss Does”. Because seriously, she does 100 retarded things in a working day and who has to clear up the mess? Moi, yours truly.

Recent developments include:

1. Screaming at me because the number of flyers delivered from a bigshot Telecom company were apparently wrong. She then proceeded to call the bigshot Telecom company and created a big hooha. She did not OPEN THE PACKAGE UP AND CHECK IT FIRST like normal people would. Turns out? The numbers were correct. Did she apologise to me? NO.

2. Agreeing to distribute 9 500 flyers for above-mentioned bigshot Telecom company to various tuition centres in Singapore (100 per centre), without first obtaining permission from these tuition centres. The 9 500 flyers were delivered. But guess what? The tuition centres were unwilling to let us distribute it in their centres.  

3. She told me she wants our free supplement magazine for Parents, hereby referred to us PW to be sensational. For the previous issue, she wanted it to be educational. Just fucking make up your mind already. I’ve never heard of any magazine whose core objective or direction changes with every issue.

4. She told me to make my articles more lively by conducting interviews. I agree that that’s a good way to spice things up and I would do it if there was time. I told her that and she said it’s not a good reason. She said the previous assistant editor, A, went to interview the Prince and Princess of our magazine and the one before her, L, went to school to do some interviews.

Not that I’m finding excuses, but the previous assistant editors had a lot more time than me. Firstly, for A, PW was only a quarterly issue which was only 28 pages thick. For L, PW didn’t even exist yet. Now, PW is a bi-monthly publication about eight pages thicker. Eight may not seem like a lot, but it’s equivalent to four articles and if she wants every article to be sensational, how am I supposed to find the time?

 She also had the audacity to say that I go home on time almost everyday, hence, I must have time. WTF? Does the contract not state that this is my working hours? It’s not like I’m leaving early. And she’s only paying me fucking $1000 + a month, not $10 000. Why should I work after-hours for her. And legally, I’m entitled to OT pay, but she doesn’t give us any OT pay although it’s a requirement by law. Her stupid attitude also does not make me feel like putting in more work. And I finish all my work before leaving. It’s not like I’m skiving and not doing work during office hours. I totally would be willing to work OT if I don’t work for someone like her. 

And in case you’re wondering why I have time to blog, this is the lull period. The editorial content for the next issue has not been finalised. When it’s the lull period, i’m really quite free, but it’s not like I can do anything since the content has not been approved by retarded boss.

5. She’s going to publish a Teens magazine, creatively named “YES!”. She intends to do it with a total team of exactly two people. One graphic designer and one assistant editor/writer. Exactly what she is doing for the kids magazine now. She pays peanuts, hires only one person for each job and expects quality equivalent to the magazines in the market which probably have teams of more than four working on them. Is she retarded or just optimistic?

Other proof my boss is a retard:

One of the so-called sensational topics she wants to be mentioned in the next issue of PW is “latch-key kids”. Except that when she told me about it, she called it “lock-key kids”. She looked aghast when I gave her a blank look. I honestly thought it was some new trend. Only when she explained what she meant did I realise that she was as usual being a retard and had gotten the term wrong.

I honestly cannot stand working with her anymore. She creates messes and expects others to solve it. She even dares to get angry when the problem is not solved quickly enough when she’s the IDIOT who caused it in the first place. She also has absolutely no standards and ethics. I’m almost embarrassed to put my name on such a UGLY and LOUSY magazine. I’ll even admit my work is lousy because how good can it be when one person is doing multiple jobs?

New developments on the workfront:

Idiotic colleague and I have bonded over our mutual hatred of retarded boss. He’s now my ally. He shall henceforth be referred to as Ally At Work or AAW, unless he starts doing idiotic or asshol-ish things again.

On my way to work today, I saw a couple of crows from a distance. When I got nearer, I saw that they were pecking at something on the ground — something in the middle of the road, bloody and dead. I had no heart to see what kind of animal it was. I hate crows.

Why It’s Not a Good Idea to Take a Bus From Noel Building to Singapore Post Centre for Lunch:

1. Because the road there is jammed every. Single. Time.

2. Ditto for the road back.

3. Because you will end up 30 minutes late, making it seem like you’re so daring as to take a 1 1/2 hour lunch break, when in actual fact, you spent 1 hour panicking about your late-ness in the bus, 15 minutes fretting over why the god-damned bus is not here yet, and the remaining 15 minutes wolfing down as much burger as you can stuff into your mouth.

4. Because you WILL have to run on uneven and badly paved roads, with your bag and just-bought magazines flailing wildly.

5. Because when running wildly, you will most likely trip or narrowly avoid twisting your ankle.

6. Because, after all that, when you arrive back at the office, you realise no one is around and no one really cares.

What I Have Learnt from Working

I know most people write such posts probably after one year of working. So what? Maybe I’m a fast learner. Ha ha. Actually you can take what I’m going to write as nonsense.

1. The customer is always right.

2. The boss is also always right.

3. Making the only person ALWAYS in the wrong – Me.

4. When you have NO original idea, just repeat what your colleague said. After which, when your boss makes any good comment, you must nod vigorously, agree whole-heartedly with her and thereby claim all the credit for the idea that WAS NOT YOURS IN THE FIRST PLACE.

5. Never use big staples for only two sheets of paper even though that is the only stapler you have because you will be forced to listen to a monologue from your boss on cutting costs, economies of scale (except that she said it all wrong) and you will be forced to un-staple the thing and re-staple it with the proper-sized staple, thereby wasting more resources.

6. It is not alright for you to do things last-minute, but it’s perfectly alright for your boss to dump a last-minute advertiser on you, 2 days before printing. It’s her prerogative. As a boss, not as a woman.

7. Blogging [insert non-work-related activity] is best during work hours.

8. Although the guilt is one hard feeling to deal with.

9. You can deal with it by promising you’ll work doubly hard, tomorrow.

10. Or, you can think of all the times you had to take shit and crap in your job and feel self-righteous. I. Deserve. This. Break.

I have been co-existing (yuck) peaceably with my colleague for the past month or so (except for a very minor incident where he subtly insinuated that I was lying and I snapped at him.), but today, I am convinced that he is an IDIOT and an ASSHOLE, with absolutely no notions of gentlemanly behaviour. Ok, since we’re living in the era of equal rights, let’s be fair and not talk about gentlemanly behaviour, but this ASSHOLE has no CONSIDERATION either.

About a week ago, my boss suddenly had a fit of irritation which she felt she must deal with by micro-managing every. single. thing. we. do. including our lunch time. My pig of a colleague likes to have his lunch as early as possible because he will DIE without food for even one minute. So he has his at 12. I generally am not hungry at 12, because it’s only been three hours into the workday, and I like to take my lunch later so I can feel happy that I only have to work four more hours after lunch, instead of five.

To cut a long story short, one day, I left for lunch at about 12:30, actually because my boss called me at 12:15 to do something for her immediately. When I came back from lunch at 1:30, my boss said in a rather nasty tone that both of us should try to have our lunch at the same time, so as to minimise the hours people are unable to contact us in the office — which is a totally STUPID thing for her to say — because if my colleague has his lunch at 12 and I have mine at 1, the office will always be staffed and we will not have to tell anyone not to call during lunch hours. But there was no stopping her crazy, insane need to vent her irritation by micro-managing, so both of us, the colleague and me accomodated her.

My colleague said he HAD to go for lunch at 12. I told my boss I was usually not hungry around that time, to which she sighed loudly. I then back-pedalled (cheap push-over that I am) and said that it would be alright if I went for lunch at 12 also. To which, she back-pedalled (insane person that she is) and said I could have it at 1. So now, our lunch hours are fixed — his at 12, mine at 1.

Except that, he will quite frequently ask me if I want to go for lunch earlier, when it’s inconvenient for him to go at 12 because it’s i.e. raining, or he’s too full because he gobbled down a bak chang 1 hour before lunch or some other inconvenience that his stupid sissy self can come up with.  Firstly, if I want to go for lunch early, I wouldn’t have asked for the 1 pm time-slot. Secondly, if it’s raining, I will get drenched as well. Do I look like I’m waterproof or STUPID? Thirdly, if you ask me to go for an earlier lunch because you have work to do, I will generously agree, but his reasons are all non-work-related, so I don’t see why I’m obliged to agree.

So, my answer to his question almost-every-single-day is, “NO!” To which he will say, “Wah liau“, like I’m being the most unreasonable bitch ever when he’s the one being an ASSHOLE.  Stop. Bugging. Me. Idiotic Asshole.