A Combination of Posts

Why It’s Not a Good Idea to Take a Bus From Noel Building to Singapore Post Centre for Lunch:

1. Because the road there is jammed every. Single. Time.

2. Ditto for the road back.

3. Because you will end up 30 minutes late, making it seem like you’re so daring as to take a 1 1/2 hour lunch break, when in actual fact, you spent 1 hour panicking about your late-ness in the bus, 15 minutes fretting over why the god-damned bus is not here yet, and the remaining 15 minutes wolfing down as much burger as you can stuff into your mouth.

4. Because you WILL have to run on uneven and badly paved roads, with your bag and just-bought magazines flailing wildly.

5. Because when running wildly, you will most likely trip or narrowly avoid twisting your ankle.

6. Because, after all that, when you arrive back at the office, you realise no one is around and no one really cares.

What I Have Learnt from Working

I know most people write such posts probably after one year of working. So what? Maybe I’m a fast learner. Ha ha. Actually you can take what I’m going to write as nonsense.

1. The customer is always right.

2. The boss is also always right.

3. Making the only person ALWAYS in the wrong — Me.

4. When you have NO original idea, just repeat what your colleague said. After which, when your boss makes any good comment, you must nod vigorously, agree whole-heartedly with her and thereby claim all the credit for the idea that WAS NOT YOURS IN THE FIRST PLACE.

5. Never use big staples for only two sheets of paper even though that is the only stapler you have because you will be forced to listen to a monologue from your boss on cutting costs, economies of scale (except that she said it all wrong) and you will be forced to un-staple the thing and re-staple it with the proper-sized staple, thereby wasting more resources.

6. It is not alright for you to do things last-minute, but it’s perfectly alright for your boss to dump a last-minute advertiser on you, 2 days before printing. It’s her prerogative. As a boss, not as a woman.

7. Blogging [insert non-work-related activity] is best during work hours.

8. Although the guilt is one hard feeling to deal with.

9. You can deal with it by promising you’ll work doubly hard, tomorrow.

10. Or, you can think of all the times you had to take shit and crap in your job and feel self-righteous. I. Deserve. This. Break.

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My Colleague is an Idiot and an Asshole

I have been co-existing (yuck) peaceably with my colleague for the past month or so (except for a very minor incident where he subtly insinuated that I was lying and I snapped at him.), but today, I am convinced that he is an IDIOT and an ASSHOLE, with absolutely no notions of gentlemanly behaviour. Ok, since we’re living in the era of equal rights, let’s be fair and not talk about gentlemanly behaviour, but this ASSHOLE has no CONSIDERATION either.

About a week ago, my boss suddenly had a fit of irritation which she felt she must deal with by micro-managing every. single. thing. we. do. including our lunch time. My pig of a colleague likes to have his lunch as early as possible because he will DIE without food for even one minute. So he has his at 12. I generally am not hungry at 12, because it’s only been three hours into the workday, and I like to take my lunch later so I can feel happy that I only have to work four more hours after lunch, instead of five.

To cut a long story short, one day, I left for lunch at about 12:30, actually because my boss called me at 12:15 to do something for her immediately. When I came back from lunch at 1:30, my boss said in a rather nasty tone that both of us should try to have our lunch at the same time, so as to minimise the hours people are unable to contact us in the office — which is a totally STUPID thing for her to say — because if my colleague has his lunch at 12 and I have mine at 1, the office will always be staffed and we will not have to tell anyone not to call during lunch hours. But there was no stopping her crazy, insane need to vent her irritation by micro-managing, so both of us, the colleague and me accomodated her.

My colleague said he HAD to go for lunch at 12. I told my boss I was usually not hungry around that time, to which she sighed loudly. I then back-pedalled (cheap push-over that I am) and said that it would be alright if I went for lunch at 12 also. To which, she back-pedalled (insane person that she is) and said I could have it at 1. So now, our lunch hours are fixed — his at 12, mine at 1.

Except that, he will quite frequently ask me if I want to go for lunch earlier, when it’s inconvenient for him to go at 12 because it’s i.e. raining, or he’s too full because he gobbled down a bak chang 1 hour before lunch or some other inconvenience that his stupid sissy self can come up with.  Firstly, if I want to go for lunch early, I wouldn’t have asked for the 1 pm time-slot. Secondly, if it’s raining, I will get drenched as well. Do I look like I’m waterproof or STUPID? Thirdly, if you ask me to go for an earlier lunch because you have work to do, I will generously agree, but his reasons are all non-work-related, so I don’t see why I’m obliged to agree.

So, my answer to his question almost-every-single-day is, “NO!” To which he will say, “Wah liau“, like I’m being the most unreasonable bitch ever when he’s the one being an ASSHOLE.  Stop. Bugging. Me. Idiotic Asshole.

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The Initiation

So today, I joined in the morning madness to get to work. Hurry hurry hurry was the theme of the morning. It felt like my initiation to the working world. This is the real thing.

See, previously, I never had to rush with the morning crowd because I live so freaking near to my old office. In a way, it didn’t even feel like I was going to work because of the nearness and because of the location of my old office. My old office was in a landed property, so it felt like I was going to someone’s house, albeit to do work.

For the uninitiated, my company has moved, to a proper office, no less. I’m still in the East, but in a rather inconvenient part. I spent 35 minutes of my lunch hour walking around in search of food. I still didn’t find any. But apparently, there are small coffeeshops and hawker centres about a 5-10 minute walk away. All I saw in my 35 minute walk was factories producing food, but not actually selling them.

Have I ever mentioned I hate taking the MRT to work? I hate the rushing, pushing and shoving. On normal days, I don’t even like taking the MRT much. I checked Streetdirectory on how to get to my office, and apparently it’s a must to take the MRT. So, imagine my surprise when I reached my office and saw bus 28 zooming by — bus 28 which passes by the bus-stop right IN FRONT of my house everyday. Stupidity aside, I’m so glad I found an alternate and better way to get to this place.

Wish me better luck on finding food tomorrow or I may be forced to go on an involuntary diet.

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Home Alone at Work

The Dick, also known as the Absolute-Pain-In-The-Ass is on leave. Ahhh… Blessed peace.

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Kowloon, Kowloon Hong Kong, We Like Hong Kong…

It may have something to do with the daily late-night dose of rented Hong Kong drama serials. Or with my need to do something crazy-different, just to break the monotony. Whatever the case may be, recently, I have been fantasising quite constantly about living and working in Hong Kong.   

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